A level update!!!!!!!! As wildly anticipated by some people -.-'''''''''



So, right, i have been too busy partying over the past few days to bother updating cos basically, ALL MY GRADES ARE IN THE PEE MY PANTS RANGE!!!!!!!. More on that later.

Some of u may remember how i constantly lament that state of obsession MOE has over academic grades. Well, i can finally see the upside to this.

If widespread reports of "extensive moderation" are to be believed, i propose a toast to the people who came up with our bold new syllabus and their everpresent eagerness to live up to it's supposed success.

They were so desperate to show that it worked that i, and several of my frens, recieved our highest grades all JC long !!!!111!!!!1!!!!ONE!!!!!11!!!!ONE!!!!!!!!1!!!

Apparently, even tho moderation was carried out, overall passes DROPPED!!!! However, i for one am NOT complaining. Neither should u. Yes, i mean u. Apparently, some subjects might have been moderated up to 5 grades in the positive direction. o.O

Anyway, on to the incredible sweaty palm friday. So in the morning, i followed f23 to the newater plant, partly to smell the sweet scent of crap before getting to drink the crap and getting crap on paper, and partly to scout out potential drowning sites.

Awyong was with me on both accounts, oh wait, he's guaranteed several As so i'm on my own here zzzzzzzz. Anyway, i met some jeston frens and we had a lot of fun ....err........discussing, ya that's right, DISCUSSING him rofl.

After viewing their quintessentially singaporean video clips of SUPREME ULTIMATE TRUTH with regards to newater, we proceded to load ourselves with that stuff in order to prep for what was to come.

By the time i arrived back at GMSS it was sorta kinda FRICKING LATE, and the other 2 had to see me in my frenzied state.....paiseh.

Rode a cab to cj, where i meticulously gelled my hair to impress all avaliable porcupines and hedgehogs (hey pretty lady~~~), but then i entered the hallowed grounds of cj and realised that my class was nowhere in sight.

As luck would have it, i met ronald chan, former maths club vp and anime fan (holla!) and late night talk show host. So we joined his class at the canteen and chatted with his bald (pfffft rofl) classmates .

All that time i was tortured by the temptimg whafts from the stalls i was SUPPOSED to enjoy ............ i got newater instead.

Met my old pal and gp teacher Mr lester lim. He's gonna do his masters!!!! and i'm gonna get owned!!!!

Anyway, that obliging tidbit tease revealed that my class passed GP, yup, everyone, and we got more As for gp than his home class (dance, baby, dance!!!!). I assured everyone within earshot that i would not be one of the As.

Apparently the class was chilling and freezing in the library so i only met them minutes prior to chernobyl.We exchanged gifts, stares, and taupoks before we were ushered and dragged into the PAC (performing arts centre or Phinished And receiving Crap)

Instantly, i saw numerous nervous faces and some familiar faces.........then i saw HER, miss lee, the ONE with MY precious, preeeeeciiiooooooouuuussssss, result slip.

I said hi, and was given the pleasure of a sour face and "oh, jovi............." as a response.........that sorta confirmed in my mind that i flunked miserably and that i should contact the newater plant asap.

After waiting for an eternity, punctuated by attemps by the hammered bro paul to compare alvan's fabulous gigantic mane to others' new jungle look, as well as meeting old classmates in various stages of physical, mental, and moral decay, bro paul made his way up to the stage to deliver the fatal blow (quick and painless it was NOT)

His opening slide read " A level results (duh) Be good, Do good, For the good of others", the school ethos for our batch.

That set our collective minds thinking, there MUST be a code hidden inside those words. In the end, t24's creative mind prevailed and we solved it in under 2 minutes, EVEN before bro paul spoke his 1st words.

Now look carefully folks, this is sheer GENIUS (not solely mine, but a class effort). I shall BOLD the important parts for your convenience:


Be good, Do good, For the good of others.


See it now?

Ok, i shall explain. In our minds, we predicted an unprecedented slaughter of astronomical proportions. Therefore, he was trying to tell us that



B is good,



D is good,



while F is good for OTHERS!!!!,



which made sense cos they would mod up, which they did XD.

So anyway, he proceeded to show us that last yr's a lvl results was the best in 10 yrs. OK, we've heard that b4............... then the next slide was "THIS YR" and blank at the bottom...we were like : it's gonna be worst in 10 yrs..................then..............................



BEST IN ELEVEN YRS!!!!! O.o o.O O.o o.O



YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!! Cheers filled the PAC. Bro paul wanted that reaction and he GOT it, BIG TIME.

At this point i had a glimmer of hope that i MIGHT have passed a few subjects.

He went on to yadda yadda yadda about the top scorers whom i shall not all mention here as most of them were expected/ unknown cosmic entities.

However, some did stand out.

Kudos to Soon Huat, who vowed to kick SJI's ass and did so not only at O level but A level as well!!! GOOD JOB!!!! Nice hair!!!

And Choong Jan Tai Lionel, for beating the odds and rising from an S for GP at prelims to an A at a level.

To put this in perspective, i would now like to state that a prominent member of my class who usually TOPPED the class for GP got a B. Oh my, things are gonna get a little bitchy! Lionel's soooo gonna get taupoked later.

Anyway, bro paul next gave us a blow by blow of how each subject did. Quite a lot of 100% passes and H1 lit topped the charts at 56.8% distinction.

Wait, is this the same H1 lit that I took? OMG!!!!!! Whoohoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's right t7 gals, i'm right there with ya.

H2 physics at 99.4% pass i was not that worried about.

H2 econ at 95.3 % pass for sure was due to moderation cos the paper was @@.

H2 maths 96.5% pass.......expected la.

GP 91.2% pass...............i m stunned.

Hopefully i was not part of the minority.

Anyway, after preliminary celebrations, we left for the classrooms where we would receive the paper of doom.

Our directionally challenged class was dum enough to miss all signs, signals, and divine intervention which clearly stated to head to the SECOND floor.

Instead we climbed the stairs all the way to the FIFTH floor to our old classroom and found that it had been CLEANED. o.O

While some could not contain their grief, others just sighed at what was lost, our sty held SO many memories, rotten cake, huge lantern, and all.

Now it was, dare i say it, PRETTY, as in pretty bleah.

After this brief setback, we squeezed in with t25 in a tiny classroom on the second floor while Miss Lee gave out random magazines and brochures ONE by ONE, a slow process.

After an eternity, she started reading out names...........in INDEX NUMBER....Being a Wong did not bode well.

I saw majority of my classmates getting at least one A, which i felt relieved. If their grades were moderated THAT much i'm sure mine must have been too. XD.

I was standing behind a certain bob and after he got his paper, i was praying that i would pass.

FINALLY, miss lee gave me a nod of approval (which was much needed)...........................then i looked down and beheld..........

A
A
C
B
A

WHAT ON EARTH DID MOE DO????????

I proceeded to dance around the classroom just vaguely aware of the increasing numbers of switched on handphone cameras pointed in my direction and cynical laughter around me.

I might have even done a few cartwheels, after which i was pleased no one got hurt. (oh well, what happens in CJ stays on youtube.)


At this point, i gave my result slip a closer look:

Econ C (well, duh, i thought i would fail, so this is a good DEAL. Thanks Miss Lee for being the BEST econs teacher and inspiring me to teach!!!!!!)

Maths B (the indra's and keli's of singapore deserved the As. Mrs Felicia Koh, u rock. U guided my path as greatly as miss lee did.)

Phy A (huh? i NEVER in my jc life got an A, and now this? physics? this was supposed to be worse than my maths!!!! oh well, i'm not complaining! Thanks MOE and dear alphonsus. Keep linking up with nobel prize winners.)

H1 Lit A (56.8% hard to miss eh? MUAHAHA sji, this is revenge for strapping me down to 8 subjects at O level, thus rendering me paralysed with regards to this wonderful subject. But all turned out well as REVENGE was a dish best served on an A level cert. However, for a subject i never got higher than 54/100, which is a D, this is pretty stunning. Mr Pang, fellow victim of lower sec geog teacher XD, thanks for relighting my passion for LIT. I knew i hadn't lost too much of my lower sec lit lol.)

GP A (anything less would have been blasphemous after LIONEL got his A, but before that i fully expected a C, oh well, stranger things have happened, see physics, for instance. Mr lester lim, u have done well coping with t24. gd luck for ur masters.)

Oh well, this means my university score is officially 82.5/ 90. Not too bad for a perennial maximum reward for minimum effort dude, if i do say so myself.

So to all who received their results on last friday, hopefully u all will chart forawrd towards your bright future. Explore all avenues of progress and check if MOE mods up the next batch too!!! For more info regarding what happened after this bizzare day, ask me personally.

Peace out!